letter to 2005

dear 2005,

i shan't pretend i'd miss you. on the contrary, i'm glad u r gonna b over. well, i m not looking forward to 2006 either. it's kinda terrifying actually... lots of things in store dat i'd need lots of faith, grace, everything for.

well, let's juz tok abt you. you have been so tough. the toughest so far for me. i've never rapped so hard, got so poor, walked so far, ate n slept so little.

but you've not been all bad. i do give thanks for you. because u've been so challenging, i found myself stretched n grown in ways i've never thot i could. my capacity increased. i never thot i could take this much crap. i've changed so much. understood better who i m, wat i m made of, wat i made for...

the chance to travel to Maldives, Aceh, US. and c n experience so many different things, met and made precious new friends, maintaining n deepening of relationships.n e reconciliation of relationships:2 dat seemed lost, but restored. i m more than thankful.

i m amazed at how close God is to me... how He knew wat i need and have been so faithful. how He renewed my vision n calling, how He gave me strength dat kept me going, faith that kept me from doubting, love dat kept me tender.

i look at you, and say with all joy and gratitude that God has made it all good.

thank you 2005.

love, evan

back fr Meta

i juz came back fr a gr8 camp! Metamorphosis Students' Conference 2005. man, i ve been really blessed! it has been such a refreshing time. wat really did it for me in this conf is the worship and being with students who are hungry for God, who are willing to share their faith, who have a vision for their campus. it's juz so gr8 to be with hungry pp. my community group esp... they are all so open in sharing.it was a privilege to b able to c how God is working in their lives.amazing! it was such a marvellous time seeing God at work... so uplifting... so fun being with them.

thank you, Hui En, Gabriel, Joshua, Samuel, Wenxian, Andrew, Stephanie, Manting, Carys, Christine, Tingyi!!

aiyah... i m rambling as usual... a bit stone... din sleep much. but was so energized by these peeps. anyway need to work... 2006 is juz 2 days away!!! AAHHHH!!!!!

b4 d camp i was so desperate for a break... needful of leave in my already packed 2006... i was wondering how... but then ... Meta really helped top up my tank...! PTL!

anyway, it was so uplifting and so heartbreaking at the same time... my heart aches for med. how i desire 2 c such faith, zeal n fire for God, for evangelism, for people in them. God...............

came back n read the newspaper... sad... another soldier drown in an exercise. the bizzare thing was that he drowned juz within 10m of 4 instructors!!! man!!! 4 pairs of supposedly watchful eyes missed spotting dat guy going under! it's so tragic!

and makes me wonder... n of course shudder... i dun wanna lose anyone given to my charge... will i b watchful n alert enuf 2 sense any1 going under? i wouldn't wan 2 b found neglectful of my duty.

u noe wat God showed me during Meta dat was so releasing? He showed me dat i ve grown 2 leave striving in min on my own strength! it was so good to noe dat i ve been growing in Him in this aspect.

oh... let me ramble back on regarding Meta...God juz met up wif me n satisfied my hunger for Him. i mean... it's like a starving man being let loose at a state banquet. i juz stuffed myself so much during the wonderful worship led by humble, gifted students.

God is so good!

into Your hands i commit again
with all i am for You, Lord
You hold my world in the palm of Your hand
and I am Yours forever

Jesus i believe in You
Jesus i belong to You
You're the reason that i live
You're the reason that i sing
with all i am

I'll walk with You wherever You'll go
through tears and joy I'll trust in You
and i will live in all of Your ways
and Your promises forever

i will worship
and i will worship You

had a gr8 time carolling yesterday at SGH, TTSH, SLH and Ren Ci... was on my feet from 730-8... never been to so many wards in a day. feet ache so bad! was surprised cos i thot i was used to it... well well... dat's called aging i guess! haha...

anyway, was fun seeing the students singing... dey were not bad considering 2 days of practise... was with them on tues while dey practised... dey actually sang fr 10-6pm...! man... such dedication...!

n, we all looked so cute in our santa caps... really helped make us look e part. was glad we went to get e caps fr concourse after tues pract.

i'll never b able to sing "Christmas isn't Christmas" d same way again... i m so used to performing in shopping centres, churches n streets during christmas... first time going to hospitals (tho technically i did not perform). the response is different... cos we were not performing in the midst of 'festivity' but pain n suffering... seeing the patients bursting into tears as dey sang was kinda disconcerting. christmas isn't christmas for so so many... we can easily "pretend" dat d people in shopping centres, n on streets are... but it's so much harder to do so in the wards.

had a good time interacting with the patients. shan't tok much on dis... must b careful wat we blog these days...

Jesus brings warmth like a winter fire

a light like a candle's glow

He's waiting now to come inside as He did so long ago

Jesue brings gifts of truth and life

and makes them bloom and grow

so welcome Him with a song of joy

and when He comes you'll know

that

Christmas isn't christmas
till it happens in your heart
somewhere deep inside you
is where christmas really starts

so give your heart to Jesus
you'll discover when you do
that christmas's really christmas for you

my fav christmas carol

Mariah Carey - All I Want For Christmas
Written by Mariah Carey and Walter Afanasieff

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There's just one thing I need
I don't care about presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true...
All I want for Christmas
Is you...

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
I don't care about presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I don't need to hang my stocking
There upon the fireplace
Santa Claus won't make me happy
With a toy on Christmas day
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you...
You baby I won't ask for much this Christmas
I won't even wish for snow
I'm just gonna keep on waiting
Underneath the mistletoe
I won't make a list and send it
To the North Pole for Saint Nick
I won't even stay awake to
Hear those magic reindeer click
'Cause I just want you here tonight
Holding on to me so tight
What more can I do
Baby all I want for Christmas is you
You...

All the lights are shining
So brightly everywhere
And the sound of children's
Laughter fills the air
And everyone is singing
I hear those sleigh bells ringing
Santa won't you bring me the one I really need
-won't you please bring my baby to me...

Oh I don't want a lot for Christmas
This is all I'm asking forI just want to see baby
Standing right outside my door
Oh I just want him for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
Baby all I want for Christmas isYou...

juz watched NARNIA

juz came back from watching NARNIA. it'll open on the 22nd... tonight's the gala premier... knew abt it when i bumped into my pri sch classmate who was also going for the same event. she told us it was gala premier... i was kinda shocked cos i was wearing a black baseball shirt n jeans...! but anyway, ain matter... cos we juz went str into the 'darkness' after collecting free pop corn combo n other freebies... the tics were great! right smack in the middle.

the movie was GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! was funny, sad, solemn, regal at the right places. Aslan was well done. prof kirk was great! peter, susan, edmund n lucy were believably kids- siblings rivalry, bossing ard etc... well carved characters. i love it! the white witch was not as icy n fearsome as i hoped she was. but check out her martial skills! she wields swords real well! but santa... was missing his red suit... was a wonder how Lucy recognised him as santa.... well, got to hand it off to the kid. only a kid could c santa in an old bearded man with a sleigh...

the movie was as the producers claimed to be (told u sometime back i met them in US) - as faithful to the book as they could make it to be. the stone table scene... the battle... wow... good sweeping scenes... good graphics...
man... juz watching it brings back how moved i was when i read the book. the stone table scene had me in tears. i had to put the book down n get on my knees. cant do dat in the cinema... the movie juz went on... so no time to get overwhelmed. but it had me sobbing nonetheless...

watching the movie made me want to re-read the whole chronicles!

PLS GO READ THE BOOK! n if u dunno how much of the gospel was alluded to in the chronicles of Narnia, call me... i'll be glad to share.

thanks Ah Li for the tic! blessed time tog.

faith. y i do wat i do.

it's incredible! seeing youths having real faith in God. yesterday, Poiema had a time of thanksgiving. Lynette, Sarah n Sheryl shared how God worked in their lives in 2005. questioning: "Do i believe in this God that my parents believe in?" and hearing "I believe", seeing how God crack 'tough nuts' and bringing them to salvation, hearing how God shows another how deep is His love and asking her to let go... it was amazing. i sat there, tear-stained, i realised yet again that this is the very reason why i m so "thick-skinnedly" hanging out with the youths, so doggedly doing min.

it was impossible to sing after that. i was crying so hard. i was so moved and so thankful to God. there was nothing i did, yet, my reward is to c faith in these young people, 2 c how God spoke and worked so unmistakably marvellously in them.

this is why i do wat i do. i live and labour to see faith; to see people come to faith in Him and grow in faith; to see young people sorting thru life, encountering God and believing in Him and get transformed. JUZ to c faith. this is why i do wat i do.

restless until find rest in You

when you hear, "now it came to pass," settle down for a good story. when God asserts, "I Am," trust his self revelation. when He promises "I will," bank on it. When He tells you, "You shall... you shall not..." do what He says.

Lord,
my heart is not proud,
and my eyes are not haughty,
and i do not go after things too great
and too difficult for me.
Surely i have composed and quieted my soul.
like a weaned child on his mother,
like a weaned child on me is my soul.
Israel, hope in the Lord forever.
(author's translation of Psalm 131)

this person is quiet on the inside becanse he has learned the only true and lasting composure. He describes what the peace that passes understanding is like (Phil 4:7)
amazingly, this man isn't noisy inside. He isn't busy-busy-busy. not obsessed or no edge. pressure to achieve doesn't consume him. Failure and despair don't haunt him. anxiety isn't spinning him into free fall. regrets don't corrode his inner experience. he's not stumbling through the minefield of blind longings and fears.
He's quiet.
are you quiet inside? if your answer is 'No', what is the 'noise' going on inside you? where does it comes from?

taken from David Powlinson, Seeing with New Eyes (New Jersey: P&R Publishing) p76
--------
You have made us for Yourself, O God,
And our hearts are restless until they find their rest in You. - Augustine

It still remains that some will enter that rest, and those who formerly had the gospel preached to them did not go in, because of their disobedience. Therefore God again set a certain day, calling it Today, when a long time later he spoke through David, as was said before:
"Today, if you hear his voice,
do not harden your hearts."
There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God's rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from his. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will fall by following their example of disobedience. - Heb 4:6,7, 9,10

should i take leave in Jan??

yesterday a M5 received Christ at Josh McDowell's Bold Truth Rally! Praise the Lord! i was nearly dancing when i spoke to him! i was praying for him since he was M3! the best part was he was invited by sci's SC who is a leader of the cell d M5 guy visited juz once... n it was an invitation in the every last min. despite knowing that the tics r sold out, d SC called the staff n asked if can scramble juz 1 more tic... thot he'll juz give it a shot. turned out that 'against the odds' invite n buying of tic paid off HUGE. c... juz by extending a mere invitation... who knows? u can help change the destiny of someone...

1122 hits... nice number...i like it

useless bits of info on inventions - toothbrushes n toilet paper

Toothbrush

Natural bristle brushes were invented by the ancient Chinese who made toothbrushes with bristles from the necks of cold climate pigs. French dentists were the first Europeans to promote the use of toothbrushes in the seventeenth and early eighteenth centuries. William Addis of Clerkenwald, England, created the first mass-produced toothbrush. The first American to patent a toothbrush was H. N. Wadsworth and many American Companies began to mass-produce toothbrushes after 1885. The Pro-phy-lac-tic brush made by the Florence Manufacturing Company of Massachusetts is one example of an early American made toothbrush. The Florence Manufacturing Company was also the first to sell toothbrushes packaged in boxes. In 1938, DuPont manufactured the first nylon bristle toothbrushes.
Hard to believe, but most Americans did not brush their teeth until Army soldiers brought their enforced habits of tooth brushing back home after World War II. The first real electric toothbrush was produced in 1939, and developed in Switzerland. In 1960, Squibb marketed the first American electrical toothbrush in the United States called the Broxodent. General Electric introduced a rechargeable cordless toothbrush in 1961. Introduced in 1987, Interplak was the first rotary action electrical toothbrush for home use
source:http://inventors.about.com/library/inventors/bldental.htm


Toilet Paper

The following may not be accurate information, the leads found indicated this: We might owe the 1857 invention of toilet-paper to American, Joseph Coyetty. We do know that in 1880, the British Perforated Paper Company created the first paper to be used for wiping after using the toilet. This paper did not come in roll form, it came in boxes of small pre-cut squares. Toilet-paper in roll form became common in America by 1907.
source:http://inventors.about.com/library/inventors/blplumbing.htm


*this is wat i do wen it's lunchtime n i m not hungry... search the web boliao-ly

1101 hits yay!

stand chart run

ok... i need to ramble... shall tok abt my stand chart run.

was so looking forward to it until it was really right round d corner! totally forgot i needed to collect my marathon pack etc... i lost track of time sometime round end of nov n beginning of dec n the run was dec4. anyway, suddenly felt flustered n unprepared for it.

well, the day came n went. lemme jolt my memory.
tok i'd sleep early but as usual i did not until 4am. slept like 2 hrs, woke up, missed d first train i was supposed 2 catch. but made no diff cos in the end, the staff were waiting for students. doesn't matter. there were so many runners in the category everyone was walking instead at the starting pt. d DJ kept saying "RUn people RUN!" so pathetic!!
so we waited till it kinda cleared.

but the run was frustrating despite the blessing of great weather n nice route. alot of pp were walking. most dun have running ethics. if u r walking or S....l....o........w.... , for goodness' sake, get out of the way! man... block n jam up the 4 lane road n swing arms dangerously some more! shucks man. was squeezing my way past hundreds n my arms n thighs kena "bua" by people's sweat! i keep my arms v close 2 my body in a tight 45 degrees with min swing . so it's not me who 'asked' for it. i mean really... i cant imagine how pp can swing arms n legs wildly when they run or juz ridiculously veer off course n bump me n bua me wif sweat!! yucks
n couldn't run at the right pace... it was like stepping on the accelerator one sec n then the brake the next. so sian.

then i too greedy for free drinks given out along the run... so i over drank!! haha... drank ice mountain... then realised... oh... 100plus! so i grabbed a cup too... so by d time i cleared the drinking stations... i was too bloated to run! haha... i asked for it.

well, finished it nevertheless. was pissed n was telling myself i'll run the half marathon next year cos everyone there was running. but then... judging fr my time... *shake head* i'll need lots of training! ok set. onz.

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever - 1 Cor 9:24, 25

movies movies

it's movies galore dis month!!!
wat i wanna watch:
CHICKEN LITTLE (d super duper cutey pie who break dances... dunno if he does dat in the movie tho...) i like guys who dances... haha... but not act cute ones...! watever... hmmm... wanted to go wif my youths... but mom oso wan to watch... told mom to watch tog wif me n youths... she ok... but now i sian. dun really wan to go thru the hassle of organising... so mayb i'll juz go watch wif mom... dunno lah... c mom's mood oso... she dunno wen wanna watch. heehee.

SAW II
man... i was waiting for this the very second the credits ran for SAW I. genius writer... really psycho. blows my mind. i love to dive into psyche of psychos...
[Main Entry: psy·chePronunciation: 'sI-(")kEFunction: noun: the specialized cognitive, conative, and affective aspects of a psychosomatic unity : MIND; specifically : the totality of the id, ego, and superego including both conscious and unconscious components
Source: Merriam-Webster's Medical Dictionary, © 2002 Merriam-Webster, Inc. ] haha added dat for fun.... isn't this educational? haha
love to dissect a mind (pun intended) it's like med students getting really excited about seeing a really gross case... psy peeps r nuts abt seeing really screwed up ones.

PRIDE & PREJUDICE
yay... Jane Austen brought to screen once again! watched the BBC serial i think... but dat was so long ago... dun rem reading d classic... did it?? well, will do so anyway b4 the month ends. must catch this... i m a HUGE literature fan... love classics being brought to screen - like jane eyre, sense n sensibility, Shakespearean plays: Hamlet, R&J, Midsummer's (hmm... i think dat's all so far in my lifetime huh) n more recently, oliver twist... but then again...this is a more modern rendition. the Straits Times review says this is "trying for a contemporary sensibility... Knightley's beauty and aggression worked against her. Lizzie, although smart and outspoken in Austen's book, is not supposed to be dazzling pretty nor brashly forthright.... This Pride is strictly for the non-Austen fan." hmmm... feels like cool water on my enthusiasm! well... i'll find some gals to watch it wif n form my own opinion on it...

KING KONG
dunno y d original was so hot. shall try to catch this new one. must b something between the gargantuan gorilla n pretty damsel. no idea man n ape haf d same taste!

NARNIA
how can i miss this gr8 E movie?? haha... C.S Lewis is THE master... go read the chronicles b4 watching it. (i blogged abt it in june i think... go read dat entry. shan't repeat). ya noe... the recommendation dat goes "if you have time for only one___" well, if you have only time n money to watch one movie, THIS IS IT!!!!!! U MUST BRING A FREN WATCH DIS!!! a prebelieving fren esp. DIE DIE must watch the Lion DIE! the movie makers worked closely with C.S. Lewis society (yes there is such!) n tried their utmost to b faithful to the novel. esp the Stone Table scene which is SO significant! how i noe?? i was in US in Jul, n they came over to our conference n let us watch the trailer b4 it was released. n told us themselves! btw, Tolkien was his roomie!

how how??! so many to watch, so little time n money...! haha... anyone wanna watch wif me?? any kind soul sponsor?? =p

dear blog,

i'm sorry for committing blog neglect d 2nd time. been busy n tired... stressed. c d outbreak on my face?! empty tank; drained n really demoralised as well. there's lots going on... happening stuff like stand chart, conference... n learnt alot! like y i get drained so easily, physiology, theology of disease n healing... will blog. another time. need to get back to preparing for LM message. bye.