thurs
it's amazing... blogged i need company to go beach - 陪我去吹吹风 and turned out the very next night, SL brought me there... i didnt even plan dat... n we had a good time catching up. it s been so long since we tokked. n y i did even call n met up was cos of how God filled me up at the sem.
it was juz thru the song - You are so beautiful. n i felt God asking me whether i would show the people i encounter n minister to what God has been showing me - that they are beautiful; that God loves them so much. i cant help but see the glory and beauty that God has packed into them. yes besides seeing flaws and weaknesses, chips, the flesh n all it's evil, wounds and scars... it was a challenge, an invite... to love and to choose to see as God does... these past 2 dayz i was so drained and so "juz abt to give up". i had felt dat whatever i did was juz not enuf n the perennial question popped up again - is this worth it? so it was again with great embarrassment that i was reduced to tears (the previous night i was crying non-stop too!) during the song "You are so beautiful".. dat not only had i saw myself thru God's eyes, i was filled with the desire and strength to again see others thru His eyes.
n so, SL... looking at her, m reminded dat whatever failures and all, despite our faithlessness, God who is faithful is always there. m i m amazed at His love for her. it is so unconditional... n dat love dat i saw... beckons me to encourage, to exhort, to love her as He did.
T_T
---
ministry is not about giving to others as much as God using it to mold his likeness into me... to cause me to see as He sees, love as He loves, feel as He feels. it is His masterful way of using others to help me as i, too, help them, on this journey to be more and more like Him.
i ve been changed. much. i blogged/shared b4 dat it is THE most exciting thing to have front row seats to witness God at work. n it is amazing juz seeing Him at work in me. i wanted to see/experience 1sthand, close up. yeah there i have it!
---
fri
it was really good finally catching up wif FL over lunch. after so many postponements (cos meetings last min work responsibilities etc), missing each other n all... FL, my hero! she helped me clear the comm room at the end of her long meeting day! saved me from my hesitation and indecision! yay yay! applause!
sorry ev, too tired to hang out at ECP. amazing how i needed pp wif me at the beach n suddenly got 2 in consec days! another time, gal.
Saturday, September 30, 2006
Thursday, September 28, 2006
i have lots i wanna say... yet... i dun wan to say it. hah. go figure.
"u've got d right 2 remain silent. anything u say will be held against u..."
juz din stop raining today
T_T
无知, 无能, 无奈...
陪我去吹吹风
ok ok...let me say some intelligible stuff. last week doc say my throat looked bad... n i was saying, "really? i dun even feel it." now really felt it. v sore! thank God it's only now n not during the retreat.
n here's the answer to the riddle posted previously.
What falls but never breaks? what breaks but never falls?
Night, Day and/or Countenance, heart
give you another riddle:
what is the beginning of eternity and the end of time and space,
the beginning of every end and the end of every place?
ok...ru entertained? gr8. wake up me when september ends.
"u've got d right 2 remain silent. anything u say will be held against u..."
juz din stop raining today
T_T
无知, 无能, 无奈...
陪我去吹吹风
ok ok...let me say some intelligible stuff. last week doc say my throat looked bad... n i was saying, "really? i dun even feel it." now really felt it. v sore! thank God it's only now n not during the retreat.
n here's the answer to the riddle posted previously.
What falls but never breaks? what breaks but never falls?
Night, Day and/or Countenance, heart
give you another riddle:
what is the beginning of eternity and the end of time and space,
the beginning of every end and the end of every place?
ok...ru entertained? gr8. wake up me when september ends.
Monday, September 25, 2006
tokked 2 jo the whole night again. settled lots of backlog stuff i din noe existed (but thanks to d outburst over the card thingy). i m so insensitive, prideful, carnal, dim-witted, half brained. sigh. n never used "par" as much till today. so golf like. man, instead of talking on the phone i could have been watching the PGA tour like how i sometimes do.lol. but well, this is way better. i'm a masochist! blogged abt it here cos i dun think i'll get to my journal soon enuf... so yeah... this is like note to self so i'd kinda rem.
time 4 bed. sigh... i gotta work at getting my sleep cycle back or else this whole week's gonna b flushed down the bowl!
God, i'm so un-Christ-like. Help me hor... pls... on my own i CMI leh... floundering here. it s juz amazing how You dare to risk ur precious ones wif me. well, guess cos U r this BIG... so... everything s in ur control. ok.. i rest in Ur peace as i labour in Ur strength. help me use this day well.
time 4 bed. sigh... i gotta work at getting my sleep cycle back or else this whole week's gonna b flushed down the bowl!
God, i'm so un-Christ-like. Help me hor... pls... on my own i CMI leh... floundering here. it s juz amazing how You dare to risk ur precious ones wif me. well, guess cos U r this BIG... so... everything s in ur control. ok.. i rest in Ur peace as i labour in Ur strength. help me use this day well.
back fr retreat. was good. Praise God. tahan-ed the lack of sleep pretty well till last night where i decided to sleep instead of staying up. Thank God for strength. had a lot of take back lessons. alot to chew on. realised i really dun like inane, purposeless stuff.
talked to Pat... he touched on something i tot was so relevant. He said dat blogs give readers a false sense of knowing a person cos it juz reveals the blogging "voice" of dat person which can b easily 2 b mistaken as who "all of" this person is. it is juz one aspect that others may juz take it as a "whole".
called for cab after checking out.. was the only one to doing check out so no more cars, peeps. NO CABS wanted to take the call!!! held on for 7 mins n they had to keep saying no cabs responded. of course la... no cab driver wants to drive all the way to changi some ulu "hill" for a SHORT trip.. not even for the extra booking fees. there was no way i could carry d fan, guit, my bag n a box 10min downhill. so i called my frenz!!
XL came to my rescue! thank u gal...! n JB too. she said my timing was perfect. she juz reached home so she could come. Thank You God 4 providing!
went jogging... but din feel like it. mind was occupied thinking abt the past few dayz n what i realised a few things. the biggest hurts come from pp whom i trusted most. the closest such that their shots hit home n even barrel thru me thus making a bigger exit hole in my back.
came back n Kiss of the Dragon was on... caught this scene where the lady lying on the hospital bed was telling Jet Li:
you are the person i trust. you are the only person i trusted my whole life. i trusted you.
i actually teared. wah i m dat touchy huh. turns out i havent resolved it on my "jog-turned-walk"
SI finals. i really do like Jon leong! (even tho i think hady is fantastic too!) i noe a jonathan whom reminds me of jon leong n i told him dat. haha... he didnt refute wat i said but confessed dat he totally cannot hold a tune unlike Jon (so yeah... he even agrees they look alike). well, nvm la. jon, u r gr8 enuf anyway.
here's a few songs dat jon sang dat was way memorable.
Snow Petrol's Chasing Cars (Grey's Anat)... lyrics reflect wat my inner voice is saying i guess.
Police's "Everything she does is magic" brought a smile to my face when i heard jon sing it. cos this song reminded me of _ n it makes me happy to think abt how it felt dat way.
talked to Pat... he touched on something i tot was so relevant. He said dat blogs give readers a false sense of knowing a person cos it juz reveals the blogging "voice" of dat person which can b easily 2 b mistaken as who "all of" this person is. it is juz one aspect that others may juz take it as a "whole".
called for cab after checking out.. was the only one to doing check out so no more cars, peeps. NO CABS wanted to take the call!!! held on for 7 mins n they had to keep saying no cabs responded. of course la... no cab driver wants to drive all the way to changi some ulu "hill" for a SHORT trip.. not even for the extra booking fees. there was no way i could carry d fan, guit, my bag n a box 10min downhill. so i called my frenz!!
XL came to my rescue! thank u gal...! n JB too. she said my timing was perfect. she juz reached home so she could come. Thank You God 4 providing!
went jogging... but din feel like it. mind was occupied thinking abt the past few dayz n what i realised a few things. the biggest hurts come from pp whom i trusted most. the closest such that their shots hit home n even barrel thru me thus making a bigger exit hole in my back.
came back n Kiss of the Dragon was on... caught this scene where the lady lying on the hospital bed was telling Jet Li:
you are the person i trust. you are the only person i trusted my whole life. i trusted you.
i actually teared. wah i m dat touchy huh. turns out i havent resolved it on my "jog-turned-walk"
SI finals. i really do like Jon leong! (even tho i think hady is fantastic too!) i noe a jonathan whom reminds me of jon leong n i told him dat. haha... he didnt refute wat i said but confessed dat he totally cannot hold a tune unlike Jon (so yeah... he even agrees they look alike). well, nvm la. jon, u r gr8 enuf anyway.
here's a few songs dat jon sang dat was way memorable.
Snow Petrol's Chasing Cars (Grey's Anat)... lyrics reflect wat my inner voice is saying i guess.
Police's "Everything she does is magic" brought a smile to my face when i heard jon sing it. cos this song reminded me of _ n it makes me happy to think abt how it felt dat way.
Friday, September 22, 2006
my gosh! i m totally insomniac! din sleep a wink since waking up 40 hours ago... n i m still not sleepy! how long more b4 i crash?? man... this is so not helping my silly ear nose throat thingy... n diarrhoea! today it was BAD! so glad i hadnt really had proper chance to eat lunch. watever cake somehow juz barely forestalled my stomach fr having a coup! but dinner got me running to the toilet 3 x! whoa my *peep* hurts man!
anyway today was a totally long day. RFG, then EFG, then some alignment briefing, Gen12ii updates, meta stuff......... got me a little fed up dey ran overtime. settled some retreat log then rushed 2 catch the infrequent bus svc down to NUS. was praying hard dat God'll help me thru d day cos was feeling sleepy n under the weather. felt like my heart pounded on my ears. man.. the swelling increased. my balance was a little affected. n my gastric was working up.had M1 DG... we celebrated (B)'s bday n Gl joined us 1st time... was surprised she asked how much the BS material costs n paid up! means she s joining us! haha... was kinda worried cos she was a little quiet for my liking n looked a bit uneasy while the other gals, guys n i juz raved all around her. DG was LLLOOOONNNNGGG... tokked on wif Shee till 5 plus... was really good... she is really open n teachable. m surprised at my stamina. still m shocked i m going strong now! waited to haf meeting wif krys. her lect juz turned into long MBBS briefing... why do they even use the word "briefing"? wat a misnomer! haiz.
finally left without meeting cos ah Li n F waiting. super late cos jam. had a good time. it turned into support raising meeting. haha. thank God! then went down after 10pm to Lou's granddad's wake. was really feeling the strain n tiredness. was wondering how much i can push myself. somehow i noe, i got it in me to run at least a 2.4k. it thrills me to push my limits, see how much more i can take. apparently...
anyway it seems like a routine now to reach home juz slightly b4 i turn into a pumpkin.
i really need to get some sleep... cant sleep leh. shucks. tmr till sun is the min retreat. cannot lah... i cant crash then. SOS!
God, come n meet us in this retreat. have Your way. we want You. we are Yours. RENEW us.
anyway today was a totally long day. RFG, then EFG, then some alignment briefing, Gen12ii updates, meta stuff......... got me a little fed up dey ran overtime. settled some retreat log then rushed 2 catch the infrequent bus svc down to NUS. was praying hard dat God'll help me thru d day cos was feeling sleepy n under the weather. felt like my heart pounded on my ears. man.. the swelling increased. my balance was a little affected. n my gastric was working up.had M1 DG... we celebrated (B)'s bday n Gl joined us 1st time... was surprised she asked how much the BS material costs n paid up! means she s joining us! haha... was kinda worried cos she was a little quiet for my liking n looked a bit uneasy while the other gals, guys n i juz raved all around her. DG was LLLOOOONNNNGGG... tokked on wif Shee till 5 plus... was really good... she is really open n teachable. m surprised at my stamina. still m shocked i m going strong now! waited to haf meeting wif krys. her lect juz turned into long MBBS briefing... why do they even use the word "briefing"? wat a misnomer! haiz.
finally left without meeting cos ah Li n F waiting. super late cos jam. had a good time. it turned into support raising meeting. haha. thank God! then went down after 10pm to Lou's granddad's wake. was really feeling the strain n tiredness. was wondering how much i can push myself. somehow i noe, i got it in me to run at least a 2.4k. it thrills me to push my limits, see how much more i can take. apparently...
anyway it seems like a routine now to reach home juz slightly b4 i turn into a pumpkin.
i really need to get some sleep... cant sleep leh. shucks. tmr till sun is the min retreat. cannot lah... i cant crash then. SOS!
God, come n meet us in this retreat. have Your way. we want You. we are Yours. RENEW us.
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
overview: staff meetings(!), then check-out, then chat wif von n trainees, went queensway, then to the doc's.
painful diarrhoea today. sigh. went to the 'crying' room during meeting 2 rest. Za n darling were there. looking at them fr where i laid.. it dawned on me how we've aged! (beautifully dat is!) they've grown more nu ren! esp my darling! so glad her hair's longer these dayz... she look beautiful these 2 TPs. yeah! (hmm... a thot juz crossed my mind.. does she have someone new in her life?? man... i should've asked! lol ) i'm amazed these 2 dear batchmates whom i havent hanged out much wif since we grad actually remembered wat my fav flowers r! (krys had sms-ed 2 ask them 4 GLAD) wow-dey actually can rem, wow-krys actually took d trouble. but she finally got me these
(sianz cannot load photos!! argh... shall do it another time)
at staff meeting break, my colleagues scared me into realising i need to start training EVERYDAY. it's way late liao! they say i must be running at least 6k everyday to make it. sigh... darling n i juz shake head. it's impossible! n i've only been running 2 dayz out of my 4 day-weekend. glad i planned to run round GC in the evening. shall b disciplined.
my running shoes gave way again. both soles which were superglued half came apart. cannot run another 10k in them. time 2 get new ones...went queensway at night. the much desired Nike wms Shox Revive is finally mine! yippee!
the old ones had 4 digits of mileage on them... no kidding... really saluate their long service! everytime i wear them, someone will ask, new shoes? i m like? huh? so old, cant u c?! lol.
i love 20th of every month... dat's wen my bank acc moves fr single digits to more digits! hee.
my 1st b'day pressie 4 this year: sonic7 called 2 tell me he got me something i can consider as a bday gift. dats early! thanks but sorry i really dun have time to mit this week!
went 2 doc's 2 get my long-postponed flu vaccine. n oso cos there's a rather alarming clicking sound in my ear when i run. doc says it's cos my nose... my allergies working up again. my ears, nose n throat pretty bad. sianz... dun c doc dun even noe i sick. i din even feel it. Dr say i've gotten so used to my allergic reactions i dun even notice anymore. he prescribed more meds 4 me.. i dun wan. told him if i need i still can get fr him or any other docs coming 4 the spiritual retreat over the weekend.
realised this.. i dun take leave i dun fall sick. last time i was pretty sick (for weeks!) after my weeklong leave at cameron. now 2 dayz leave, my nose runs like a river... everything is affected. ear nose throat all connected. sigh.
reading this christian novel. pretty fine. got this riddle inside:
what falls but never breaks? what breaks but never falls?
can u get it? stay tuned for the answer!
painful diarrhoea today. sigh. went to the 'crying' room during meeting 2 rest. Za n darling were there. looking at them fr where i laid.. it dawned on me how we've aged! (beautifully dat is!) they've grown more nu ren! esp my darling! so glad her hair's longer these dayz... she look beautiful these 2 TPs. yeah! (hmm... a thot juz crossed my mind.. does she have someone new in her life?? man... i should've asked! lol ) i'm amazed these 2 dear batchmates whom i havent hanged out much wif since we grad actually remembered wat my fav flowers r! (krys had sms-ed 2 ask them 4 GLAD) wow-dey actually can rem, wow-krys actually took d trouble. but she finally got me these
(sianz cannot load photos!! argh... shall do it another time)
at staff meeting break, my colleagues scared me into realising i need to start training EVERYDAY. it's way late liao! they say i must be running at least 6k everyday to make it. sigh... darling n i juz shake head. it's impossible! n i've only been running 2 dayz out of my 4 day-weekend. glad i planned to run round GC in the evening. shall b disciplined.
my running shoes gave way again. both soles which were superglued half came apart. cannot run another 10k in them. time 2 get new ones...went queensway at night. the much desired Nike wms Shox Revive is finally mine! yippee!
the old ones had 4 digits of mileage on them... no kidding... really saluate their long service! everytime i wear them, someone will ask, new shoes? i m like? huh? so old, cant u c?! lol.
i love 20th of every month... dat's wen my bank acc moves fr single digits to more digits! hee.
my 1st b'day pressie 4 this year: sonic7 called 2 tell me he got me something i can consider as a bday gift. dats early! thanks but sorry i really dun have time to mit this week!
went 2 doc's 2 get my long-postponed flu vaccine. n oso cos there's a rather alarming clicking sound in my ear when i run. doc says it's cos my nose... my allergies working up again. my ears, nose n throat pretty bad. sianz... dun c doc dun even noe i sick. i din even feel it. Dr say i've gotten so used to my allergic reactions i dun even notice anymore. he prescribed more meds 4 me.. i dun wan. told him if i need i still can get fr him or any other docs coming 4 the spiritual retreat over the weekend.
realised this.. i dun take leave i dun fall sick. last time i was pretty sick (for weeks!) after my weeklong leave at cameron. now 2 dayz leave, my nose runs like a river... everything is affected. ear nose throat all connected. sigh.
reading this christian novel. pretty fine. got this riddle inside:
what falls but never breaks? what breaks but never falls?
can u get it? stay tuned for the answer!
Monday, September 18, 2006
cant believe
cant believe it...
1) it's been a week n the gals whom i hang out wif at the food n book fairs last sun were still harping abt how MUCH i ate! (basically ate a whole day's worth of food intake at one go) shocker huh
2) dat lydia said my blog is dead... hey 4 entries (mon, wed, fri n sat!) n one more b4 the new week starts. wat is dead??
3) did a choral reading on "God's heart for all nations" for missions conf at svc. had fun rehearsing wif D b4 svc. was good comic relief. i meant me. made a few mistakes at the real reading. i wished we had made it more fun instead of so sombre. the highlight of the day was dat some pp came up to me to say they like my voice! dat it was so nice, sweet. i was like "huh?" haven t they heard my voice enuf? but this was a reading thingy... n i was more narrator/compere-like... n, haha.. my youths were saying i sound so nice n gentle. so unlike me... some say i should talk like dat more... n i did... n got them fits of laughter. yeah... cant believe sometimes i can sound very nice, esp over the mic... most times, i sound hoarse n brutish (muahaha!)
4) my 2 dayz leave is not enuf. took leave 2 salvage my brain. it's a case of "too little too late". i'm a little more needy than i think! hee... such a loafer! a bit wasted i havent gotten round 2 do as much as i hoped. cant believe i can b so busy doing nothing!
5) cant believe i've turned into such a homey! stayed home 2 dayz.. n today came home by 230 i think... (cos i din eat lunch wif the youths... man... pasta mania cum movie... they cant believe wen i say it's expensive. dey dun noe how little i earn huh... i'd earn more working at macs... but dat's not the point. ) n i wanna stay home more!
6) cant believe i dun wanna talk much these dayz... nope not depressed or anything... juz not as keen to yak.
7) cant believe i'm in this paradoxical mood... wanna hang out wif frenz but dun really wanna hang... wanna find someone to share deeply... but... as i go thru the long list of close confidants... i dunno... like i said, dun feel like tokking... guess i'll juz stick wif Jesus for now.. not much time at hand anywayz. sorry if i din seem so keen in meeting up... sorry YT for today's snub.
8) cant believe i wanna watch matrix all over again! watched hlaf of matrix reloaded on ch5 today... thot i'd like to rewatch the whole trilogy. haha... shall end wif quote fr Morpheus: "what if the war will end tomorrow? isnt it something worth fighting for? isnt it something worth dying for?"
1) it's been a week n the gals whom i hang out wif at the food n book fairs last sun were still harping abt how MUCH i ate! (basically ate a whole day's worth of food intake at one go) shocker huh
2) dat lydia said my blog is dead... hey 4 entries (mon, wed, fri n sat!) n one more b4 the new week starts. wat is dead??
3) did a choral reading on "God's heart for all nations" for missions conf at svc. had fun rehearsing wif D b4 svc. was good comic relief. i meant me. made a few mistakes at the real reading. i wished we had made it more fun instead of so sombre. the highlight of the day was dat some pp came up to me to say they like my voice! dat it was so nice, sweet. i was like "huh?" haven t they heard my voice enuf? but this was a reading thingy... n i was more narrator/compere-like... n, haha.. my youths were saying i sound so nice n gentle. so unlike me... some say i should talk like dat more... n i did... n got them fits of laughter. yeah... cant believe sometimes i can sound very nice, esp over the mic... most times, i sound hoarse n brutish (muahaha!)
4) my 2 dayz leave is not enuf. took leave 2 salvage my brain. it's a case of "too little too late". i'm a little more needy than i think! hee... such a loafer! a bit wasted i havent gotten round 2 do as much as i hoped. cant believe i can b so busy doing nothing!
5) cant believe i've turned into such a homey! stayed home 2 dayz.. n today came home by 230 i think... (cos i din eat lunch wif the youths... man... pasta mania cum movie... they cant believe wen i say it's expensive. dey dun noe how little i earn huh... i'd earn more working at macs... but dat's not the point. ) n i wanna stay home more!
6) cant believe i dun wanna talk much these dayz... nope not depressed or anything... juz not as keen to yak.
7) cant believe i'm in this paradoxical mood... wanna hang out wif frenz but dun really wanna hang... wanna find someone to share deeply... but... as i go thru the long list of close confidants... i dunno... like i said, dun feel like tokking... guess i'll juz stick wif Jesus for now.. not much time at hand anywayz. sorry if i din seem so keen in meeting up... sorry YT for today's snub.
8) cant believe i wanna watch matrix all over again! watched hlaf of matrix reloaded on ch5 today... thot i'd like to rewatch the whole trilogy. haha... shall end wif quote fr Morpheus: "what if the war will end tomorrow? isnt it something worth fighting for? isnt it something worth dying for?"
Saturday, September 16, 2006
1.40pm i finally stop procrastinating. signing up 4 MULTIPLY n LJ account now. so irritating la... esp LJ! argh... i was trying to get it over n done wif but all my usual nicks r taken! like evan-essence n watever deviations! 5 min later... still struggling wif LJ! man! 10 min later... ok gr8! i'm done. now i have 2 more accounts wif new nicks n passwords to rem. wat a challenge for my over-taxed, low-capacity storage facility... think some pp call it "brain". eh shucks! i 4got my multiply password!
was on leave yesterday. actually had a whole day planned...but woke up 2 heavy rain... n i couldnt possibly lug my oil painting and easel n paints ard in dat torrent. so i cancelled my outdoor plans grudgingly... was asking God y? then kinda got the answer. the last time when it rained the whole day (i was at work in NUS) like how yesterday was, i was telling God i would like to be able 2 stay at home on a day like dat! n so... here it is! wow! u mean... God arranged it on my leave day juz as i ve asked some time back? wow... suddenly my whole perspective changed. stayed in... played my guit, my piano (the "black gang" as i lovingly termed them yesterday), read, journalled... then managed to jog in the late afternoon wen it finally stopped pouring. so i had my much-needed beach visit during my jog. was a nice restful day.
went out to paint at night.it had started drizzling again. (then i realised the rain stopped nicely so i could go for my hour-long jog! cool....!) donned in surfing berms (those nice waterproof kneelength ones), my standchart marathon tee, and my trusty bertulas, with a book, PDA, paints, brushes, palette n easel stashed into my huge duffel slung over my right shoulder, my acoustic guit over my left and my 'oil-on-canvas-80%-done' painting in my hand, i thot how i looked was a good snapshoot of me.
staying in today 2 finish my backlog journal entries n read my book, check email, settle some work stuff, prep for tmr svc n cell, n hopefully jam wif the black gang! thank God for rest! aaaaah..!
this is a disclaimer i long wanted to write:
i noe my entries used 2 b more didactic n some will say "spiritual". but now it has 'degenerated' into some lousy blow-by-blow account of my daily life... well... all i can say to those who r disappointed cos of your high regard of 'spirituality' and how full time workers should act or write... i kinda want this 2 b abt my "meaningless" (hey it's biblical! it's in Ecc! actually only in NIV) or, as this blog's title suggests, evanescent(which is nearer the original meaning in Ecc) existence... so if u want some educational sermon-like stuff, go read online sermons... or other blogs which i'm sure u've found. if not, i can direct you to some. n i thank you 4 visiting nonetheless. (if u think i m directing this at you, NO I M NOT. dun b so sensitive. i'm juz writing this for fun, to get it off my chest.)
was on leave yesterday. actually had a whole day planned...but woke up 2 heavy rain... n i couldnt possibly lug my oil painting and easel n paints ard in dat torrent. so i cancelled my outdoor plans grudgingly... was asking God y? then kinda got the answer. the last time when it rained the whole day (i was at work in NUS) like how yesterday was, i was telling God i would like to be able 2 stay at home on a day like dat! n so... here it is! wow! u mean... God arranged it on my leave day juz as i ve asked some time back? wow... suddenly my whole perspective changed. stayed in... played my guit, my piano (the "black gang" as i lovingly termed them yesterday), read, journalled... then managed to jog in the late afternoon wen it finally stopped pouring. so i had my much-needed beach visit during my jog. was a nice restful day.
went out to paint at night.it had started drizzling again. (then i realised the rain stopped nicely so i could go for my hour-long jog! cool....!) donned in surfing berms (those nice waterproof kneelength ones), my standchart marathon tee, and my trusty bertulas, with a book, PDA, paints, brushes, palette n easel stashed into my huge duffel slung over my right shoulder, my acoustic guit over my left and my 'oil-on-canvas-80%-done' painting in my hand, i thot how i looked was a good snapshoot of me.
staying in today 2 finish my backlog journal entries n read my book, check email, settle some work stuff, prep for tmr svc n cell, n hopefully jam wif the black gang! thank God for rest! aaaaah..!
this is a disclaimer i long wanted to write:
i noe my entries used 2 b more didactic n some will say "spiritual". but now it has 'degenerated' into some lousy blow-by-blow account of my daily life... well... all i can say to those who r disappointed cos of your high regard of 'spirituality' and how full time workers should act or write... i kinda want this 2 b abt my "meaningless" (hey it's biblical! it's in Ecc! actually only in NIV) or, as this blog's title suggests, evanescent(which is nearer the original meaning in Ecc) existence... so if u want some educational sermon-like stuff, go read online sermons... or other blogs which i'm sure u've found. if not, i can direct you to some. n i thank you 4 visiting nonetheless. (if u think i m directing this at you, NO I M NOT. dun b so sensitive. i'm juz writing this for fun, to get it off my chest.)
Friday, September 15, 2006
G.L.A.D
i wanted to call it a day n not come online... but tonight got stuff MUST blog! it's GLAD - Group Leader Appreciation Day.
was surprised 2 c my M5 guys whom i ve not seen 4 quite sometime! 2 read the card dey wrote... i almost forgot all d heartaches dey gave me over these past 4 years! hee...
my gals wore pink today! n i stupidly din make the connection! Jo, WT, Shee, (B), xTelle, krys... i was even commenting "how come every1 is wearing pink today?" without suspecting some form of conspiracy! i must have turned innocent again! lol. then again, in my defence, i must say, S n LF n a nursing student, von n i were oso wearing pink lor... dat makes 11 pink pp! so i juz tot: "YAY! today's pink day!" n dat made me really happy!
realised (in retrospect) dat i ve grown... changed my ministry attitude... not looking 2 man 4 applause/affirmation as desperately as i used 2... in the past GLADs, i would b thinking - wat will my disciples do? etc... but today, i was...well, nonchalant! din even suspect or detect their ploys
anyway, the MAIN thing i wanna blog abt was the song d gals sang to me. was an across 3 years item. was sidesplitting la!
I love You Jesus deep down in my heart.... (along with the giggly wiggly butt action!)
then 2nd verse - I love you, DARLING....(then they do the "guns" action at me. quite stylo. lol)
aiyoh! was sooooo touched dat they were willing to subject themselves to such embarrassment juz cos i'd get such a kick outta this! was trying to stifle my giggles on the bus wen i think back on tonight. such a waste dun have camera or vid cam to catch the item n capture all of us donned in pink!
n of course.. the side HIGHLIGHT is the cards i got! (haha... sorry it's not d pressies...) i love WORDS! med pp quite eloquent wen it comes to writing. will read them over n over n over n over again!
WT juz told me (over msn) : "if tt day u didnt call me aftr tt lab session, i might not hv had committed to c____" wah!!!
i recall calling out her name, waving n saying hi... as she past my bench. wow... the power of remembering names n greeting pp!
dun underestimate the POWER OF THE WAVE! lol
was surprised 2 c my M5 guys whom i ve not seen 4 quite sometime! 2 read the card dey wrote... i almost forgot all d heartaches dey gave me over these past 4 years! hee...
my gals wore pink today! n i stupidly din make the connection! Jo, WT, Shee, (B), xTelle, krys... i was even commenting "how come every1 is wearing pink today?" without suspecting some form of conspiracy! i must have turned innocent again! lol. then again, in my defence, i must say, S n LF n a nursing student, von n i were oso wearing pink lor... dat makes 11 pink pp! so i juz tot: "YAY! today's pink day!" n dat made me really happy!
realised (in retrospect) dat i ve grown... changed my ministry attitude... not looking 2 man 4 applause/affirmation as desperately as i used 2... in the past GLADs, i would b thinking - wat will my disciples do? etc... but today, i was...well, nonchalant! din even suspect or detect their ploys
anyway, the MAIN thing i wanna blog abt was the song d gals sang to me. was an across 3 years item. was sidesplitting la!
I love You Jesus deep down in my heart.... (along with the giggly wiggly butt action!)
then 2nd verse - I love you, DARLING....(then they do the "guns" action at me. quite stylo. lol)
aiyoh! was sooooo touched dat they were willing to subject themselves to such embarrassment juz cos i'd get such a kick outta this! was trying to stifle my giggles on the bus wen i think back on tonight. such a waste dun have camera or vid cam to catch the item n capture all of us donned in pink!
n of course.. the side HIGHLIGHT is the cards i got! (haha... sorry it's not d pressies...) i love WORDS! med pp quite eloquent wen it comes to writing. will read them over n over n over n over again!
WT juz told me (over msn) : "if tt day u didnt call me aftr tt lab session, i might not hv had committed to c____" wah!!!
i recall calling out her name, waving n saying hi... as she past my bench. wow... the power of remembering names n greeting pp!
dun underestimate the POWER OF THE WAVE! lol
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
2.41am
i have so much to blog... but but... haiz... the words r not flowing! shall attempt later...
2.44am
to LJ or not to LJ? to multiply or not to multiply?
i really want 2 leh...but m really not keen to hold so many accounts la... sianz. Y cant my friends juz b simple n keep everything on the public domain? Y haf diff levels of privacy? of course i wanna kip in touch wif wats up in ur life... but why cant things b simpler?
think wat i want to blog abt comes in spurts... my brain's like a car breaking down... moves a bit... stalls... driver starts up the engine... jerks forward... stalls...
2.57am
i miss driving. i really do want to drive... i wanna car!
3.03am
i'm tired.
y m i staying up? cos i have unfinished business for the nite. juz aint happy abt not getting stuff done b4 hitting the sack.
3.05am
learnt so much thes few dayz... it's amazing how God teaches me something or shows me something...then confirm it thru some1 else! eg the sem speaker, (B) sharing what God has shown her, the book i m led 2 read... i juz wrote in my journal some dayz back asking God to confirm d stuff He has told me. n, He has been! n i m expecting more signs
attending LEADER FORMATION seminar all day mon-wed. learnt alot. got alot of thinking n reflecting to do. many many questions (dat shant b posted here). m kinda surprised n comforted by my good (godly) attitude! (haha), dat i m not discouraged or frustrated. must b God answering your prayers, guys! thanks!!! kisses!
3.11am
aarrrggghh! i juz found out i m so totally broke! no wonder my card cannot get thru! my cheque 4 $71.82 even bounced! n the bank charged me $40 for a bounced cheque! seriously, y does the bank charge me 4 d money dey noe i DUN HAF?! btw, i lost my easilink... AGAIN... 2x in a month! wat a record! d last time was eons ago! it never rains but pours huh.
3.17am
went 2 SUNTEC today... man...! was made to walk thru Msq, Millenia n almost 1/2 round d place lah! m pissed so called jo on the hp to rant while i walked... n cont 2 wen we met. jo got sucha kick out of it. i juz cant believe such lousy human traffic directions lah. they so efficient in road traffic, security control n all... it's kiasuism at its best! *applause* almost swore off coming to suntec in the near future... but after a whole night there n there's practically no1 ard, i might juz come back 4 d quietness during this World Bank n IMF meetings! the bars n eateries ard oso not happening liao! hah. juz recalled i noe some1 working at world bank! ooooohh...
met Ben n Jo...wasnt expecting to stay out long much less even reach home after midnight. (anyway had to back track to look 4 my easilink). wasnt expecting 2 take so long to decide on where to eat... then watch them agonize over wat to eat. was ok la.
4.20am
thankful Jo accompanied me 2 look 4 my easilink. company makes detours bearable, even memorable. (locked doors n walking looking up at millenia)
realised oso dat i didnt subject myself 2 d usual self-battering i wld've in the past. after i gave vent 2 - as joanne pointed out - a smiley "angst" (which was a short while), i was ok. im surprise la... usually takes a long while 4 me 2 get over my own tirade
oh, had a stye for 2-n-a-half dayz. gone now. (haha.. so random... but must blog cos my journal's not so frivolous... =p)
another random one-
last sun, SL asked me wen can go vietnam wif her... YY offered mom n i 2 return air tics 2 bangkok... but NMNT *shrug*
1-liners on lessons learnt (well, u noe e verses so shant type out) :
whatever is in your heart will come out in your hands(actions).
b watchful. dun let weeds overrun the ground of your heart.
dat requires discipline, obedience
tongue, anger. bridle it... or let it set u on fire.
okay *yawns* ttfn(tata for now)
i have so much to blog... but but... haiz... the words r not flowing! shall attempt later...
2.44am
to LJ or not to LJ? to multiply or not to multiply?
i really want 2 leh...but m really not keen to hold so many accounts la... sianz. Y cant my friends juz b simple n keep everything on the public domain? Y haf diff levels of privacy? of course i wanna kip in touch wif wats up in ur life... but why cant things b simpler?
think wat i want to blog abt comes in spurts... my brain's like a car breaking down... moves a bit... stalls... driver starts up the engine... jerks forward... stalls...
2.57am
i miss driving. i really do want to drive... i wanna car!
3.03am
i'm tired.
y m i staying up? cos i have unfinished business for the nite. juz aint happy abt not getting stuff done b4 hitting the sack.
3.05am
learnt so much thes few dayz... it's amazing how God teaches me something or shows me something...then confirm it thru some1 else! eg the sem speaker, (B) sharing what God has shown her, the book i m led 2 read... i juz wrote in my journal some dayz back asking God to confirm d stuff He has told me. n, He has been! n i m expecting more signs
attending LEADER FORMATION seminar all day mon-wed. learnt alot. got alot of thinking n reflecting to do. many many questions (dat shant b posted here). m kinda surprised n comforted by my good (godly) attitude! (haha), dat i m not discouraged or frustrated. must b God answering your prayers, guys! thanks!!! kisses!
3.11am
aarrrggghh! i juz found out i m so totally broke! no wonder my card cannot get thru! my cheque 4 $71.82 even bounced! n the bank charged me $40 for a bounced cheque! seriously, y does the bank charge me 4 d money dey noe i DUN HAF?! btw, i lost my easilink... AGAIN... 2x in a month! wat a record! d last time was eons ago! it never rains but pours huh.
3.17am
went 2 SUNTEC today... man...! was made to walk thru Msq, Millenia n almost 1/2 round d place lah! m pissed so called jo on the hp to rant while i walked... n cont 2 wen we met. jo got sucha kick out of it. i juz cant believe such lousy human traffic directions lah. they so efficient in road traffic, security control n all... it's kiasuism at its best! *applause* almost swore off coming to suntec in the near future... but after a whole night there n there's practically no1 ard, i might juz come back 4 d quietness during this World Bank n IMF meetings! the bars n eateries ard oso not happening liao! hah. juz recalled i noe some1 working at world bank! ooooohh...
met Ben n Jo...wasnt expecting to stay out long much less even reach home after midnight. (anyway had to back track to look 4 my easilink). wasnt expecting 2 take so long to decide on where to eat... then watch them agonize over wat to eat. was ok la.
4.20am
thankful Jo accompanied me 2 look 4 my easilink. company makes detours bearable, even memorable. (locked doors n walking looking up at millenia)
realised oso dat i didnt subject myself 2 d usual self-battering i wld've in the past. after i gave vent 2 - as joanne pointed out - a smiley "angst" (which was a short while), i was ok. im surprise la... usually takes a long while 4 me 2 get over my own tirade
oh, had a stye for 2-n-a-half dayz. gone now. (haha.. so random... but must blog cos my journal's not so frivolous... =p)
another random one-
last sun, SL asked me wen can go vietnam wif her... YY offered mom n i 2 return air tics 2 bangkok... but NMNT *shrug*
1-liners on lessons learnt (well, u noe e verses so shant type out) :
whatever is in your heart will come out in your hands(actions).
b watchful. dun let weeds overrun the ground of your heart.
dat requires discipline, obedience
tongue, anger. bridle it... or let it set u on fire.
okay *yawns* ttfn(tata for now)
Monday, September 11, 2006
how handicapped i feel wen MSN is down! man... it really is a HUGE part of my everyday work and social communication with students and friends! come back on soon k?
m reminded 2 'check heart' at Leader Formation Seminar today. m glad finally have taken leave! need dat time to spend wif God. (juz dis little each day is not enough.. need extended. i'm troublesome, ya noe! hee)
n learnt today dat i've grown indeed! my attitude towards hearing the "impending S inevitable" (haha... i call it however i like!) at this aft's "TIME-OUT"... the restful surrenderedness, the recognition dat beyond management failures, men's reluctance, seemingly "coincidences", is God's invisible hand at work, not juz in the min, but also in my life, molding my character, my skills... yep.. all my whining and frustrated venting... despite dat, underneath dat, hidden fr the naked eye - metamorphosis!
next lesson to nail - HOW TO SAY "NO"
(dat one i fail alot of times liao! sigh... latest failure... today! sorry N & X... it's easy for u to suggest all the harsh stuff... but i cant bring myself to...!)
m reminded 2 'check heart' at Leader Formation Seminar today. m glad finally have taken leave! need dat time to spend wif God. (juz dis little each day is not enough.. need extended. i'm troublesome, ya noe! hee)
n learnt today dat i've grown indeed! my attitude towards hearing the "impending S inevitable" (haha... i call it however i like!) at this aft's "TIME-OUT"... the restful surrenderedness, the recognition dat beyond management failures, men's reluctance, seemingly "coincidences", is God's invisible hand at work, not juz in the min, but also in my life, molding my character, my skills... yep.. all my whining and frustrated venting... despite dat, underneath dat, hidden fr the naked eye - metamorphosis!
next lesson to nail - HOW TO SAY "NO"
(dat one i fail alot of times liao! sigh... latest failure... today! sorry N & X... it's easy for u to suggest all the harsh stuff... but i cant bring myself to...!)
Saturday, September 09, 2006
3x 40min
it's been a crazy few dayz!
wed was stressful.
did a team Birkman. got the results and review. got lots to think mull over. and.. the biggest stress question i had was... now dat i noe this, how do we go fr here? how do i lead?
my brain was messy/chaotic. bad sign. too many things to do! so many pp to meet...finally nailed my schedule down a bit. gives me a bit more stability and order. haha.
thurs:
had a long long day! din expect M2 DG to go way long. tokked abt priorities. was juz reflecting on my priorities earlier in the day (in the toilet!) my priorities were pretty non-mainstream...
then had a gr8 time wif Ning n Leen (DVD, food, stay-over thingy) would ve been way better if i had organised it on fri... but yeah... i have funny logic (fuzzy logic - muahaha). De-lovely is a gr8 movie! something u wont mind watching a few times over! n dat z wat they did cos i reached 40min after they started. so we watched it the 1st hour of the show again after it ended. then watched 2become1. pretty educational...then tokked the whole night!
then pia my teaching notes n ppt at dawn.
was a disaster IMO(in my opinion) but they(director n some new staff) said good leh. i realised i dun really take into account when pp say i did well one.. think i abit previcarious! i din tihnk i did ok n dat s the bottomline. think i din really understand the lesson notes n purpose well enuf... it's such a loaded question dat s juz as much i can do for 60 min mah. so yeah. haha.. can u imagine? 60 min lessons stretched to 2 hours?! n it's really not my doing! HP didnt mind us going on! the questions came relentlessly! some pitied me cos they say i kena bombed/shelled/blasted. i din really feel the heat tho... maybe thermometer down. juz tried to answer best as i can. then leave it to God lor. i like this kind of class better than another dat doesnt ask.
hence was late for lunch appt by 40 min! Paul was mad - "is it me? u wont do dat if u were meeting PM right? i noe saving the whole or evangelising the ibans is more impt but can do dun do dis to me again? tell me if u dun wan to meet me, u dun need to resort to this ok?" for goodness' sake la, Paul. i was trying not 2 get fed up wif him cos it's my fault 2 begin wif. the tiredness n lack of sleep was getting 2 me too.
then M5 guys were late for DG... then DN was 40 min late meeting me. i was so falling asleep... couldnt hold up... TCC coffee din work. i think i snored at NLB while waiting, then nod off uncontrollably at city hall reading my book.
went home finally at 10pm. sis wanted to pack her stuff in our room. got awoken by her at least 4 times! n mind u, i m dead tired, n i m a heavy sleeper. so waking me up wen i crash was no easy feat. so by 1am i was so awoken n bothered dat i wanted to get up n do some work but wisely decided my body cannot take it. went back 2 sleep after screaming at her. (!)
glad the weekend is here. shall unwind n keep hold my peace. man... GTG out again.
akan datang - politically charged entries...
wed was stressful.
did a team Birkman. got the results and review. got lots to think mull over. and.. the biggest stress question i had was... now dat i noe this, how do we go fr here? how do i lead?
my brain was messy/chaotic. bad sign. too many things to do! so many pp to meet...finally nailed my schedule down a bit. gives me a bit more stability and order. haha.
thurs:
had a long long day! din expect M2 DG to go way long. tokked abt priorities. was juz reflecting on my priorities earlier in the day (in the toilet!) my priorities were pretty non-mainstream...
then had a gr8 time wif Ning n Leen (DVD, food, stay-over thingy) would ve been way better if i had organised it on fri... but yeah... i have funny logic (fuzzy logic - muahaha). De-lovely is a gr8 movie! something u wont mind watching a few times over! n dat z wat they did cos i reached 40min after they started. so we watched it the 1st hour of the show again after it ended. then watched 2become1. pretty educational...then tokked the whole night!
then pia my teaching notes n ppt at dawn.
was a disaster IMO(in my opinion) but they(director n some new staff) said good leh. i realised i dun really take into account when pp say i did well one.. think i abit previcarious! i din tihnk i did ok n dat s the bottomline. think i din really understand the lesson notes n purpose well enuf... it's such a loaded question dat s juz as much i can do for 60 min mah. so yeah. haha.. can u imagine? 60 min lessons stretched to 2 hours?! n it's really not my doing! HP didnt mind us going on! the questions came relentlessly! some pitied me cos they say i kena bombed/shelled/blasted. i din really feel the heat tho... maybe thermometer down. juz tried to answer best as i can. then leave it to God lor. i like this kind of class better than another dat doesnt ask.
hence was late for lunch appt by 40 min! Paul was mad - "is it me? u wont do dat if u were meeting PM right? i noe saving the whole or evangelising the ibans is more impt but can do dun do dis to me again? tell me if u dun wan to meet me, u dun need to resort to this ok?" for goodness' sake la, Paul. i was trying not 2 get fed up wif him cos it's my fault 2 begin wif. the tiredness n lack of sleep was getting 2 me too.
then M5 guys were late for DG... then DN was 40 min late meeting me. i was so falling asleep... couldnt hold up... TCC coffee din work. i think i snored at NLB while waiting, then nod off uncontrollably at city hall reading my book.
went home finally at 10pm. sis wanted to pack her stuff in our room. got awoken by her at least 4 times! n mind u, i m dead tired, n i m a heavy sleeper. so waking me up wen i crash was no easy feat. so by 1am i was so awoken n bothered dat i wanted to get up n do some work but wisely decided my body cannot take it. went back 2 sleep after screaming at her. (!)
glad the weekend is here. shall unwind n keep hold my peace. man... GTG out again.
akan datang - politically charged entries...
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
Ning, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
darling, may you keep your eyes on the Lord so that you will sway neither to the left nor to the right; that you love Him, choose Him, seek Him above all else. may He lead and guide you, keep u safe from harm, cause u to delight always in Him.
lookin forward 2 d DVD/fast food hang-out cum pyjama party! kip ur fingers crossed dat i'll be able 2 finish prep my lessons!!
darling, may you keep your eyes on the Lord so that you will sway neither to the left nor to the right; that you love Him, choose Him, seek Him above all else. may He lead and guide you, keep u safe from harm, cause u to delight always in Him.
lookin forward 2 d DVD/fast food hang-out cum pyjama party! kip ur fingers crossed dat i'll be able 2 finish prep my lessons!!
Monday, September 04, 2006
Sunday, September 03, 2006
so feeling under the weather... m so tempted to change the blogskin... went surfing for it... but, but...
liked a very pink one... angel motif... but it's too diabetic for my current mood... the other one i deliberated on was more reflective of my "under the weather mood"... dunno... may change later.
had lunch wif yeep. was the most "life saving" act i did this week... felt so much more revived. she 1) agreed i was pathetic. LOL ( i seriously m still hitting myself over my head on y i m STILL this pathetic!) 2) told me: i'm not back at square one... i've grown. 3) exhorted me - it's nice 2 b humbled isnt it? be humbled not discouraged.
the other life saving (or rather mood saving) act i did was 2 have my first ever proper pedicure last monday. made me happy. really needed such pick-me-ups in view of current sucky bout.
came back n napped for 6 hours! now head aching bad. groggy n all. wonder if it s possible to get some sleep b4 the work week starts.
mood forecast - overcast, might turn stormy.
liked a very pink one... angel motif... but it's too diabetic for my current mood... the other one i deliberated on was more reflective of my "under the weather mood"... dunno... may change later.
had lunch wif yeep. was the most "life saving" act i did this week... felt so much more revived. she 1) agreed i was pathetic. LOL ( i seriously m still hitting myself over my head on y i m STILL this pathetic!) 2) told me: i'm not back at square one... i've grown. 3) exhorted me - it's nice 2 b humbled isnt it? be humbled not discouraged.
the other life saving (or rather mood saving) act i did was 2 have my first ever proper pedicure last monday. made me happy. really needed such pick-me-ups in view of current sucky bout.
came back n napped for 6 hours! now head aching bad. groggy n all. wonder if it s possible to get some sleep b4 the work week starts.
mood forecast - overcast, might turn stormy.
Saturday, September 02, 2006
i m such a bitch. i feel a growl rising inside. i bite. i'm not a nice, friendly person. there's so many pp/things i dun like. i break rules. i challenge norms. i dun fit in2 d holy moly mold (even tho tons of pp errantly think so.) i rebel. n, i dun care if u dun like me. so... bite me.
charm kept telling me dat b4 i came in2 youth, she saw me outside more than couple of times. she didn't dare call me cos i looked so dao wearing my sunglasses, wif a tight-jaw, cold, dun-mess-wif-me expression... now dat she gotta noe me, she said i m so diff, so friendly, so easily amused. dis is me, dat s me too...!
gotta watch my lang... MINORS like charm, sarah k, lydia n a whole lot who dun tag me (tsk!) read my blog! yikes! maybe i should do those "peeP" censors, like instead of blogging "i m such a b*****", i should say i m such a "peep".
anyway, had so much fun wif the GALS (E,D,X,N) last nite celebrating N's b'day. n we'll need 2 celebrate X n mine b'days, christmas n new year b4 she goes over 2 japan! cant believe time flies this fast! had dinner at PL's, had fondue at HD. terribly stuffed! joked last nite wif the Gals dat i m suppressed, repressed, depressed, impressed. haha. wanted 2 order a cold dark one... din. missed bumming into CL at PL... cos i stayed late in NUS wif DN. realised i miss CL... we've been wanting 2 hang but havent been able to... i need 2 meet her soon... i need my cold dark 1... dat reminds me... my list of "to meet up SOON" runs fr tampines to buona vista! argh.
it's like an annual event bumming into G. last time was oso last sept, us out celebrating N's bday.. at some cheesecake factory izzit? something lydat. i realised, to my horror, i dun even miss G. i wasnt thrilled we bummed n dat the rest called her to join us. we used 2 b REAL close! wat happened? man...i've become this cold, heartless PEEP. ohh... so alter ego... i'm splittting!!!!!
n, re men...D is proudly marrying a cradle-snatcher... last nite i confessed 2 them n sis im turning in2 one! i outdo myself on the age gap limit on both ends. x years younger (my baby bro - as he calls himself, puts his foot down on dat one) n 23 years senior! recovering fr the JS upset. the GALS had much 2 say abt dat. started a whole series of "men...blah..they use $...blah.. lead up to..." nope we r not sexists nor feminists, i assure u. dey were more sympathetic than i expected.
it s incredible who we end up wif... 2 of us end up wif sec schmates... as did loads of our AH counterparts. E is in dis retro-have-coffee-wif-ancient-x thingy, n as she puts it we 3 r swinging singles.... even tho 1 of us is refusing 2 "come of the 'attached' closet"! haha.
n X still insists i make a lousy wedding planner based on my track record of late turn-ups (4 d record, i only went wif her to ONLY 1 wedding!) i asserted dat (similar to wat L told me too) dat to make sure i m there on time, or even b there for the matter, my frens get me to org their wedding! G asked if i would turn up for hers... i chirped dat i'd have to consider. much to her chagrin.
stayed wif E until her super-late frens turned up. they went DXO.originally 2 go velvet... i cld ve joined her... but didnt, despite lamenting dat i m so outta touch wif e clubbing scene! juz name me any club n i 'd admit i havent been there! the party animal inside hasnt really died... but i m so not releasing it into the open.
this song s 4 the in-the-valley-me. introduced 2 us at ST retreat by S.. (oh.. i have alot of "S" in my entries! hmmm... hope i can rem who dis S is... lol!) cheers, evan!
MOUNTAIN of GOD
I thought that I was all alone,
broken and afraid,
but you were there with me,
you were there with me.
And I didn't even knowI had lost my way,
but you were there with me,
yes, you were there with me.
Till you opened up my eyes I never knew,
that I couldn't ever make it without you.
Chorus:
Even though the journey's long,
and I know the road is hard.
Well the one who's gone before me,
He will help me carry on.
And after all that I've been through,
now I realize the truth
that I must go through the valley
to stand upon the Mountain of God.
As I travel on the road,
you have led me down,
you are here with me,
yes, you are here with me.
And I have need for nothing more
Oh, now that I have found
that you are here with me,
yes, you are here with me.
I confess from time to time I lose my way,
but you were always there to bring me back again.
~chorus~
Bridge:Sometimes I think of where it is I've come from,
And the things I've left behind.
Well, of all I've had,what I posess,
they can't quite compare,
with what's in front of me,
with what's in front of me.
~chorus~
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. - Heb 12:1
I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. - Phil 3:14
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! 2 Cor 5:17
charm kept telling me dat b4 i came in2 youth, she saw me outside more than couple of times. she didn't dare call me cos i looked so dao wearing my sunglasses, wif a tight-jaw, cold, dun-mess-wif-me expression... now dat she gotta noe me, she said i m so diff, so friendly, so easily amused. dis is me, dat s me too...!
gotta watch my lang... MINORS like charm, sarah k, lydia n a whole lot who dun tag me (tsk!) read my blog! yikes! maybe i should do those "peeP" censors, like instead of blogging "i m such a b*****", i should say i m such a "peep".
anyway, had so much fun wif the GALS (E,D,X,N) last nite celebrating N's b'day. n we'll need 2 celebrate X n mine b'days, christmas n new year b4 she goes over 2 japan! cant believe time flies this fast! had dinner at PL's, had fondue at HD. terribly stuffed! joked last nite wif the Gals dat i m suppressed, repressed, depressed, impressed. haha. wanted 2 order a cold dark one... din. missed bumming into CL at PL... cos i stayed late in NUS wif DN. realised i miss CL... we've been wanting 2 hang but havent been able to... i need 2 meet her soon... i need my cold dark 1... dat reminds me... my list of "to meet up SOON" runs fr tampines to buona vista! argh.
it's like an annual event bumming into G. last time was oso last sept, us out celebrating N's bday.. at some cheesecake factory izzit? something lydat. i realised, to my horror, i dun even miss G. i wasnt thrilled we bummed n dat the rest called her to join us. we used 2 b REAL close! wat happened? man...i've become this cold, heartless PEEP. ohh... so alter ego... i'm splittting!!!!!
n, re men...D is proudly marrying a cradle-snatcher... last nite i confessed 2 them n sis im turning in2 one! i outdo myself on the age gap limit on both ends. x years younger (my baby bro - as he calls himself, puts his foot down on dat one) n 23 years senior! recovering fr the JS upset. the GALS had much 2 say abt dat. started a whole series of "men...blah..they use $...blah.. lead up to..." nope we r not sexists nor feminists, i assure u. dey were more sympathetic than i expected.
it s incredible who we end up wif... 2 of us end up wif sec schmates... as did loads of our AH counterparts. E is in dis retro-have-coffee-wif-ancient-x thingy, n as she puts it we 3 r swinging singles.... even tho 1 of us is refusing 2 "come of the 'attached' closet"! haha.
n X still insists i make a lousy wedding planner based on my track record of late turn-ups (4 d record, i only went wif her to ONLY 1 wedding!) i asserted dat (similar to wat L told me too) dat to make sure i m there on time, or even b there for the matter, my frens get me to org their wedding! G asked if i would turn up for hers... i chirped dat i'd have to consider. much to her chagrin.
stayed wif E until her super-late frens turned up. they went DXO.originally 2 go velvet... i cld ve joined her... but didnt, despite lamenting dat i m so outta touch wif e clubbing scene! juz name me any club n i 'd admit i havent been there! the party animal inside hasnt really died... but i m so not releasing it into the open.
this song s 4 the in-the-valley-me. introduced 2 us at ST retreat by S.. (oh.. i have alot of "S" in my entries! hmmm... hope i can rem who dis S is... lol!) cheers, evan!
MOUNTAIN of GOD
I thought that I was all alone,
broken and afraid,
but you were there with me,
you were there with me.
And I didn't even knowI had lost my way,
but you were there with me,
yes, you were there with me.
Till you opened up my eyes I never knew,
that I couldn't ever make it without you.
Chorus:
Even though the journey's long,
and I know the road is hard.
Well the one who's gone before me,
He will help me carry on.
And after all that I've been through,
now I realize the truth
that I must go through the valley
to stand upon the Mountain of God.
As I travel on the road,
you have led me down,
you are here with me,
yes, you are here with me.
And I have need for nothing more
Oh, now that I have found
that you are here with me,
yes, you are here with me.
I confess from time to time I lose my way,
but you were always there to bring me back again.
~chorus~
Bridge:Sometimes I think of where it is I've come from,
And the things I've left behind.
Well, of all I've had,what I posess,
they can't quite compare,
with what's in front of me,
with what's in front of me.
~chorus~
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. - Heb 12:1
I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. - Phil 3:14
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! 2 Cor 5:17
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)